Friday, September 12, 2008

the puzzle..

Wow! That is really all I can say about the chain of events surrounding me right now. I am so overwhelmed with my life..don't get me wrong, I love my life, it is just crazy right now. So many unexpected things.........
Ok, now let me laugh at myself.......isn't this what I ask for on a daily basis? Don't I ask God every single day to use me........don't I tell Him that I want to be His vessel?
I guess until just now, I haven't really looked at my life since becoming a christian and asking God to work the unthinkable through me. I haven't actually been putting the pieces of the puzzle of my life together, I have just been tossin em in a jar to look at later. Wow....what our God can do with a life.
Let me tell you...I used to be a pretty selfish person...pretty shallow. I mean, I wasn't a mean person, but I lived to make me happy. Did I help people? Absolutely....but I did expect something in return, if nothing other than a thank you. But today, it seems that all I want to do is help ... genuinely help ... and most often I find myself not wanting to tell anyone what I have done and when told thank you I give thanks to our Father.
I didn't really pay attention to this change in me....I didn't really notice til yesterday that my life has dramatically changed. I didn't realize that I haven't asked what my purpose was or where am I going in this life in quite sometime.
Guys...I am healed....I am cleansed....I am transformed...I am His! He has blessed my life beyond anything I could ever have imagined. He is using me to get to people. He is giving me opportunities to share His love. He is challenging me beyond my wildest dreams. He has shown me that I am a servant........I am His servant.........and that means that I am humbled before all. That means that I give before I take. That means I love without reason. That means that I don't turn my back on a challenge or change my course because of a bump in the road. And that means that He loves me unconditionally and so that is what I am to can I turn my back to anyone that He puts before me when He would never turn His back on me? My life is meant to be lived. I am not here to just exist. I am here to minister.